OUR VHS TAPE

Sun’s in me eyes

Lifts the colour right off

The sky and church roof (side view)

Are the same blue

There’s our Mary by the style

Her coat bleeding scarlet in the shade

Low winter sun

Erases strips off the mountain

Where the tree-shadows stand on

Bit of mystery there in these old trees

Zoom in and pan the rolling horizon

Hands and breath shaking with altitude

Ice in this here puddle shattered

Cows bow their heads to the sun

Shadows tracked mud at their feet

There’s meat on that alright

Their breath trails left by steam trains.

 

Old mill clock still going

Old quarry face

Old cobble still here

He stood still here

All these bankings full of heather

Railway line – disused

In t’garden outside t’window with our Mary’s pots:

The bird-bath

Where a wren perched to tap its beak against the frost

 

History outlived him

When the camera turns to him

The wind takes his voice

He stands still here

He does not split under the lense

As the old mill chimney did

Shattered in a puddle of rainbow static

He is only a pause

In film

A bird spotted

Flat-capped in a blue-coat

 

A sharp intake of Oh

As a blackbird escapes

the footage.

GIVE

The ice on the lake is giving

The rain pummelling the Earth for its sweetness

Everything has a tongue

Salivating wind and fire

All hungry for a bit of me

I’ve become enough to weather this

Pawing, stripping, hungry gnawing

A Cailleach teaches me

How to let fire fold over my arms

I have my winter pickings

Unspun wool, bone, rosemary and pinecones

The fire can take my dead cells

The wind my hot breath

The Cailleach my hair

The words I spoke

Could’ve been smoke

Sweetened by burning oak among pine

Soon my cuttings will be sapling

The things picked from me seed

The bees will help the wind

Carry stolen sweetness and greenness

Frogspawn will be bubbling in the lake

And the calves will be suckling

And this place’s touch will be cleaned from me

Now at my chest like a charcoaled hand-print

These sleeping bodies piled around me

Warm in someone else’s night.

CAT OBITUARY

This cat couldn’t keep her canines

or drool inside her lips.

Big beads of cat spit

dripped from her whiskery muzzle

and hit warm on our skin,

her frail chest shuddering with purrs

of machine gun affection.

She was the one who clawed

half-live mice into the kitchen

and maimed the fledglings my mum had loved all of last spring.

Now she is buried beneath their nest

where squawcks of new born hunger

taunt the bugs from her bones

and terrorise her shoebox

coffin dreams of fleeing

tails, tickles to the chin

and sunlit windowsills in morning.

 

A PARTICULAR LITTER

The spring sun falling through the window,

on a late winter morning,

hits the same every year.

Like a friend I forgot I could love spilling

into an embrace of remembered warmth.

The trees will blink free from their comas

of mourning. I wonder

if they sometimes grieve

the miscarriage of a particular litter of leaves,

more than the countless others?

I used to try and keep the bubbles in my bath

as pets when I was really little,

I guess it’s a similar thing.

I DON’T SEE WHAT ANYONE CAN SEE IN ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU

Sunlight on my sickbed,

Restlessness of morning

Nuzzling me awake,

Licking my eyelids warm.

Face down drawing in bed,

Used tissues: belly-up beetles

Waving legs.

Juno soundtrack, record crackle

With my throat infection

Attempts to sing along.

Catching afternoon sun between my toes.

Composing cards, playlists and pictures

To post the distance

Strung across our skulls

Fairy-lit bridges.

 

I sneeze the sun from the sky

And it coughs out snow.

Rush to open window,

Feverish cold,

Outstretched palm:

Melting into goose-bumps and guilessness

Garden green catching the wet on its leaves/tongues with me.

Spores, Ohmu,

Spring morning snow;

The strange, fatal beautiful.

Global warming, toxic forests, separation

Platform for days

To keep us grateful.